Recently, we watched "Change Up" movie. It's basically a change up process happened between two good friends: one got a family with kids vs. another being a single guy. Basically, the single man is envious of a married life with kids and a married man with kids'juties and responsibilities was envious of the freedom of a single man. After having the change up, they started to experience each other's life.
I can see that where the author is coming from with such base story line. I bet that thoughts of change up click a lot of parents'mind once in a while. In this modern society, being parents with a full-time job ain't easy. I'm one of them so no exception :)
Being a parent put one's life into a totally different perspective. It makes me discover the other side of me. At the same time, it makes me learn of how amazing it's to see one's capabilities and tolerance beyond normal boundaries when one is put into the situation.
Barack Obama quoted that being a parent is the toughest job he has ever done. I couldn't agree more to it. Being a parent is tough but trying to be a good parent is even tougher. Entering into a parenthood is chartering one's life into a new chapter. It's a life-changing event. From he and me to we, he and me. Yes! It's WE. There's a third or fourth little addition(s) to the family. I, myself, my ego, my selfishness became a thing in the past. It's about promoting of myself into a parent role and stepping down of myself from my personal preferences and priorities. Our own priorities automatically go to the back seat and they become our priorities literally.
I have to admit that I weren't really prepared initially. Therefore, my road to parenthood was quite bumpy at the beginning. It was like learn and cope as I go. There were lots of adjustments at the beginning. I had then encountered those contradictions where a mom's natural instincts of sacrifices and love for her own baby collides with those of her little ego and selfishness which became surfaced up every once in a while. Those were so-called challenges I'd to deal with by then.
The process of transforming into a mature good mother from a spoiled little brat by her parents and her husband was quite a bit of a learning process. However, a mom's natural instincts and love to her own kids has shaped me into a selfless me over time.
I can see that where the author is coming from with such base story line. I bet that thoughts of change up click a lot of parents'mind once in a while. In this modern society, being parents with a full-time job ain't easy. I'm one of them so no exception :)
Being a parent put one's life into a totally different perspective. It makes me discover the other side of me. At the same time, it makes me learn of how amazing it's to see one's capabilities and tolerance beyond normal boundaries when one is put into the situation.
Barack Obama quoted that being a parent is the toughest job he has ever done. I couldn't agree more to it. Being a parent is tough but trying to be a good parent is even tougher. Entering into a parenthood is chartering one's life into a new chapter. It's a life-changing event. From he and me to we, he and me. Yes! It's WE. There's a third or fourth little addition(s) to the family. I, myself, my ego, my selfishness became a thing in the past. It's about promoting of myself into a parent role and stepping down of myself from my personal preferences and priorities. Our own priorities automatically go to the back seat and they become our priorities literally.
I have to admit that I weren't really prepared initially. Therefore, my road to parenthood was quite bumpy at the beginning. It was like learn and cope as I go. There were lots of adjustments at the beginning. I had then encountered those contradictions where a mom's natural instincts of sacrifices and love for her own baby collides with those of her little ego and selfishness which became surfaced up every once in a while. Those were so-called challenges I'd to deal with by then.
The process of transforming into a mature good mother from a spoiled little brat by her parents and her husband was quite a bit of a learning process. However, a mom's natural instincts and love to her own kids has shaped me into a selfless me over time.
Having Hyperemesis Gravidarum during both of my pregnancies had made me started to realize of what it takes to be a mom. Life has never been the same since then. Everything becomes not just about myself and I always need to factor in for those little ones of mine.
Sleepless nights were just another beginnings. It ain't really easy for someone like me who got pretty annoyed for being disturbed during the sleep. I had learnt to sleep when my little ones fell into asleep and to wake up them they were up. No more sleeping until getting past the lunch time during weekends. No more instances of staying up all night like before. Well, no one stops me from it but go suffer it the next day if I dare to do so. As I need to be up to take care of the girls the next morning so such privilege of doing so got literally and automatically revoked :P
I used to be very particular and sensitive for certain perspectives. For instance, I would puke up and stopped eating for bringing up any poop or pee during my meal. But changing my baby's diaper and cleaning her up had made me a whole new me. Oh and yes, there got countless times I got to do it right in the middle of my meal. And even until now, girls wanted and needed to go to the restroom right during my meal at the restaurant so I gotta keep them company and clean them up as and when necessary. And I can't even remember how many times that I gotta clean up their messes after throwing up.
Speaking of priorities, they are our number#1 priority for almost every prespective. An example being, picking a restaurant? Yeah, we always end up going wherever they wish to eat. Weekend getaway or family vacation spot? It leaves us with only very limited options considering for kid-friendly places. I always used to picture myself cruising around Europe with him but it now becomes a thing in the future. Yep, someday, one day when kids grow up. It becomes a thing in far future. How could we make an enjoyable vacation to there with cranky, grouchy little ones who couldn't really walk for a long time. And most of all, they wouldn't even enjoy what they're seeing or experiencing anyway so what's the point?
As you can see, being in a motherhood had shaped me a different person: a better, more efficient and disciplined one I guess :P. And when I want to discipline the girls, I'd better set myself as a good example, right? And I got gradually separated from most (if not all :P. But I still procrastinate whenever I get a chance though, LOL :P) of the procrastinations and draggings stuff. Becoming a multi-tasker is another plus I would say. It's all about changing my life styles.
Most of my spare time is now devoted for them. I'm giving up well more than half of time upon them instead of keeping it for myself. Other than doing house chores, my daily duties now include helping Sophie with her school lessons, homework, piano lesson, etc. And most of my Saturday is gone by keeping girls company for the classes they want to go such as ice skating, piano, arts, etc. Recently, Sophie got swim classes so I go to work early so that I could get it off early and bring her to her swim lessons on time. My daily schedule starts from 6:30am in the mornings til 10:30pm (at least if not later).
I used to feel so tired and not feeling like doing anything once I got home from work. But now I could stretch my day longer after a long day. It's so amazing to learn of myself that things which I thought I wouldn't be able to do could be achieved. It's also not surprising that I now become incredibly more patient person than before.
Parenthood has changed me in so many ways. It made me explore the other side of me. On one hand, I discover a whole new me. On the other hand, it made me understand my parents' love and sacrifices for me even more. I understand their gratitude, love and sacrifices before. But after I've put into the situation, it became crystal clear and made me understand deeper. It's not just that I know it, it becomes that I've been there.
And I have come to realize that I'm going on a different path from my friends who are still singles. Being singles, it is all about oneself and everything is centered around oneself. After getting married, it becomes about "two" persons. Compromises and adjustments to each other's life styles, personalities and habits are starting to get taking place. Being a parenthood has even further refined one's life greatly. Technically, transformation of oneself from the self-centered me to a selfless me. It's a huge deviation from a single's life.
I used to be envious of my single friends' lives. Guess that I basically mourn the lost freedom of mine by seeing their carefree lives where they could do anything they want without having to take into consideration of anything. But it didn't last long and I felt guilty for my selfishness as a parent on the other hand. My parents did all those for me before and it's now my turn. I feel so embarrassed just to think of those of my selfishness.
I'm bringing up the lives of two little persons which are my own blood. It's no doubt a lot of work and involve countless sacrifices. As a full-time working mom, I'm very tired and exhausted most of dthe time at the end of the day. Keeping up with those energetic little ones is not easy indeed. But guess what? First of all, I love them so much. Second of all, those cute sweet little girls naturally master the skills to make me pleased. I am blown away by their loving kisses and hugs, sweet words and cute gestures. Michelle often comes to him or me and tell us like "Mama/Papa, you're my favorite!" and starts kissing all over my face. Sophie will bring me a glass of water or climb on me with her worries and concerns when I get sick.
A lot of the times, they make me laugh and they are capable of making my tiredness and unhappiness evaporated in no time. With them, I never feel lonely. Every night when I put them asleep and when they grab my hands from each side and fall into asleep, I feel so blessed and loved. Staring at those two little innocent faces make me forget everything (including the tiredness) but love.
Now, I'm not even used to with my life without having them around. When I'm away from them, I feel so empty and just could not get used to with unusual quietness. I miss those noises. They drive me nuts from time to time. They make me exhausted always. But happiness and ecstasy they give us well surpass them. I guess that's what it takes to have the good spices of life and that's what makes our life so colorful. My life has drastically changed ever since I got them. It's so rewarding at the end of the day though. Simply put, no matter what it's just so worth it. Life with kids, it's so priceless!
A lot of the times, they make me laugh and they are capable of making my tiredness and unhappiness evaporated in no time. With them, I never feel lonely. Every night when I put them asleep and when they grab my hands from each side and fall into asleep, I feel so blessed and loved. Staring at those two little innocent faces make me forget everything (including the tiredness) but love.
Now, I'm not even used to with my life without having them around. When I'm away from them, I feel so empty and just could not get used to with unusual quietness. I miss those noises. They drive me nuts from time to time. They make me exhausted always. But happiness and ecstasy they give us well surpass them. I guess that's what it takes to have the good spices of life and that's what makes our life so colorful. My life has drastically changed ever since I got them. It's so rewarding at the end of the day though. Simply put, no matter what it's just so worth it. Life with kids, it's so priceless!
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